Alariwo Lifematics: Knowing Her

#np: How to Love- Lil wayne

🙂 So it’s the Season of Love (lool) Did I see all the guys in the house frown? Oh yeah. Never mind you all, it would be all good, and over soon. GOD would provide money for you to buy that “special” gift and to pull off that “special” treat for that special one

Yeah underline the word “Special” after reading this post from our guest writer @femiry (*whispers* @d ladies dat’s his twitter handle 😉 ) you should understand what I mean 🙂

Enjoy, don’t be greedy, Share with a friend!

Many guys have expressed their concerns about how to develop a good relationship with a girl. In many ways – and as a very general statement – girls seem to have more intuitive skills when it comes to relating. The male is often accused of being insensitive and non-caring, of failing to notice and of being self-absorbed.

While we don’t wish to endorse totally such a blanket generalization, we can understand the concerns. Men behaving badly can give a believable general impression that only the physical side of the relationship is important to them. In a recent football match, one newspaper reported that two supporters had thrown their girl-friends away to concentrate with watching the games! lool… Such extreme actions make the myth of the unromantic male that much more believable.

If there’s one non-sexual compliant that we hear more often than any other from girls about their boyfriends it’s that they aren’t romantic. In other words, girls are expecting a certain kind of behaviour, and are disappointed when it doesn’t happen. Of course, some boys can go over the top and shower their loved ones with flowers, gifts, chocolates and the rest. That’s not what girls are asking for either.

So what do Girls Really Want?

Some times it’s really confusing, isn’t it? Your get jumbled signals and mixed reactions. I remember one boy coming up to my mum totally puzzled: ‘I went to see my girl-friend and when I got there she complained about me not getting her flowers. So next time I brought some flowers and she complained that I was just trying to make up for the other day.

Another perplexed suitor complained that his girl-friend told him that sex was all boys ever thought about. Not long after she was complaining about him not touching her enough. For the male mind some of these reactions can be stranger. Behind them there is the truth that what girls really want is for them to be appreciated for what they are as a whole and complete people. If a girl is just a collection of sexual objects then she’ll recognize that she is not being appreciated for who she really is.

A couple of comments from the girls’ side: “I keep on catching him looking at my curves!” “He keeps on saying how beautiful I am but I want him to like me because of my personality too”.

In building a relationship, you must go beyond the physical appearance. We all are not what we look like on the outside. Your physical desire may make the visual appearance of a girl the most important factor in your mind. But remember you are not trying to love a doll or a statue but a complex human being. Physical beauty is only one aspect. What about personality, a sense of humour, intelligence, skill, abilities, honesty, morals, spiritual commitment, education and all other that make us what we are?

Ending the Confusion

Take the boy who was confused when told all he thought about was sex and when told off for not touching. What the girl is trying to say is that she wants affection to be expressed, it is more than just a sexual way. Love and admiration can be shown in light caresses of the hands and face just as much as touching areas normally considered to be ‘sexual’.

And the boyfriend who can’t get it right whether to bring flowers or not may be showing an attitude not appreciated by his girlfriend. You can’t expect to come along with a bouquet of flowers and think that gifts make everything right. You are not trying to buy love or affection either, or to ‘atone’ for some wrong by bribery!

You need to be more sensitive to feelings and perceptions. A truly deep relationship is based on mutual understanding & trust. That takes time, and if all you’re concerned about is to satisfy your physical senses, then you will not give an opportunity for a deeper and more meaningful relationship.

So since this month is a Season of Love; Ladies tell us/Show us how to love you better; Tell us what you want from your boyfriend or lover? Also bro(s) how do u think we get it all wrong with our ladies ?

SpokesMan #BoyFriend Association reporting for Alariwo

Even our Friend Jackie Chan needs a help on this one…lool

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18 thoughts on “Alariwo Lifematics: Knowing Her

  1. shakara says:

    1st off,1st on 😀
    Girls….they want attention more then anything.the giving and the starving of it from both parties is key to a successful relationship.sometimes guys hould pay attention more and girls should pay less. Post is spot on guys,keep it up

  2. Saliu Brenda says:

    Nice work bro bt stl findn it hard 2 bliv u did dis!its good.mmuuaahh!

    • Saliu Brenda says:

      Ladies nid TLC @ all times..understandn men is difficult so its nt all d times da ladies r complicated men r too,funny n immature smtymz bt stl r amazn.we nid respect,nid 2 b treated wit respect i no we can b demandn smtymz bt its jst US(ladies)daas who we we xpect our boyfriends 2 b demselvz…we r nt askn 4 too mch!*wink*

  3. CaRebEar says:


  4. @IAmSizzla says:

    Misguided feelings, every other time of the year should be filled; treated, attended to; with such love. Affections & emotions are key to Relationships, not wallets & gifts…..mehn for whatever reason, once she’s not a ‘one naira’ babe, & she’s more of a p-square babe, its a give & take, no long thing, buh if she is…..Spend Money!!!!!!!

  5. @iHaffTire4YouO says:

    Lmao…cool story bro!

  6. Ok I read this and was like “ok, true”. Not all girls though are in touch with that romantic side of them. Some girls believe its all about affection and some believe its all about compliments and gifts (which are two very contrast things that seem to happen in d same sense). Guys on the other hand, they know what girls want already but choose not to give it to them, because they feel like too much attention and affection can cause “see finish”.
    Guys see the need to spend on and have sex with their girls because we come across as “fragile beings”.. That is not love and affection. Don’t let anybody fool u. B4 guys, girls lived.. After guys, they will live.
    But at the end of the day, human beings are humans. We all want the same thing. The only thing is very few appreciate that love and attention.
    I believe if you’re a guy or girl it makes no difference, fragile or not. We just confuse each other.
    With all that’s said and done (shut up toke, u talk tooooo much).. NICE WRITE UP YO. 🙂

  7. Didi says:

    I’m a girl and i don’t Know what I want, or rather, my Wants change with seasons. Guys should learn to use their intuition….

  8. temmy says:

    nice post,we just need to be appreciated,but guys shld learn to study our moods and knw when a girl wants to hear she’s beautiful,smart,sexy or funny!.girls too shld try to give their guys clues.

  9. shante001 says:

    The truth is when u get 2 understand us u wil find out we are not complicated @ all, we just want u guyz 2 b able e read nd understand our body language, even wen we say it’s alryt nd u knw it’s not. We love pampering nd a guy who shows us love nd respect nd not hoping 2 get anytin in return, guyz we are not complicated

  10. Marian says:

    Lol…great post. Both parties would always be complicated. It basically boils down to maturity.

  11. Nimi says:

    A lady like me who isn’t so mushy & all needs affection & support.
    Affection shouldn’t be too much, I get pissed of by that. By support I don’t mean financial, most girls or let me speak for myself, i can fend for myself, I mean emotional. Someone who can tell when you’re emotionally down & knows the key to making you feel better..

    Nice write-up. 🙂

  12. honeydewAmos says:

    Ok,I think almost every guy already knows how his gurl wants to be treated or loved buh they tend not to show it cos they wanna prove that fact that “yh,I’m a man,being too affectionate is jst gonna expose my weakness for her or somfn” …..which I think is so unfair nd selfish cos a gurl on the other hand never fails to show how much she cares. Nice write-up tho 🙂

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